Change scares us…. 5 tips to overcome it.
As the new year approaches, most are creating resolutions: Eat healthier, Exercise more, or Do-the-big-things-I’ve-always-wanted-to-do-but-never-could-do.
They may be fired up, new gear, a stocked healthy fridge, etc…. But by the second Friday in January, they quit. It’s such a common occurrence that it’s been deemed “Quitter’s Day.”
Why is that?
Part of it is we need at least 21 days to establish a new habit. The second Friday in January almost always falls short of 21. This year, it’s the 10th.
The other part is that we humans don’t like change. We’ve been hardwired not to. Instinctually, things that are different are threats to us. That bush looks funny? That’s ‘cause there’s a tiger hiding in it. This tree is crooked? Because it’s dying and can fall on us.
It’s so deep that our body will self-sabotage us. Ever start a new diet and suddenly get hit with a cold? That’s your body trying to say, “Hey, don’t do this, I’m scared!” Every decided you’re going to work out, and suddenly your knee is acting up? Again, that’s your body.
So, how do we get past this hurdle?
Pair the new habit with a current habit.
As some of you have seen with the dojo’s social media last year, Aldrich Sensei posted almost daily. (Forgive the two months.) Part of that success was it was paired with my morning coffee. Not only did the job get done, but I probably enjoyed more hot coffee that way. (I’m notorious for letting my coffee go cold). Find something you enjoy and pair it.
Set yourself up for success.
We are impulsive, let’s-do-the-easy-thing-first, creatures. Any small hurdle to stop you becomes a mountain. Want to go to the gym? Pack your bag the night before. Want to head to the dojo? Pack your gi bag beforehand. Gi isn’t clean? Maybe get yourself a second one. Side note: Everyone should have more than one gi.
Reward yourself with small wins.
We are dopamine creatures. That’s why social media, our phones, and TV are addictive. Find a small way to reward yourself. Take a selfie of your victory, or give yourself a small piece of chocolate. During the first few days of a new gym connection, I get myself small pieces of gym clothes. Often, new socks. Nothing beats new socks.
Track it.
What your mind tells you and what statistics tell you are two different things. I tell all my martial arts students that our activities are empty cups. When we do them, we put drops of water into that cup. The more you do a thing, the more water you have in that cup. There’s also an added bonus to tracking – a reward. When I started my “pain pad” (acupressure mat), I would color in a circle on my habit tracker. It’s like a reverse advent calendar. I use my favorite bright marker, and when I hit that first perfect row…. Chef’s kiss! I’ll include a copy at the end of this blog.
Get Support; We’re Community Beings.
You don’t need to tell the world, but ask 1-2 friends to hold you accountable. I always recommend this for martial arts. Classes are more successful when you have someone making sure you follow through. At our dojo, if you are supposed to be at class, Sensei or another student will check in on you. Not only does that keep you accountable, but we also make sure you’re safe and healthy. (Things happen!)
In most dojos, the most challenging class (either in skill or on the day of the week) will have a social waza afterward. Morning classes will do breakfast get-togethers. Advanced classes will have pizza and beverages. In our dojo, on Tuesday nights, we have Japanese beer and random snacks. Many dojos do a social waza on Fridays. Friday night is the most challenging night for getting people to take class; everyone is tired of work or school.
Good Luck with your 2025. Being a better version of yourself can feel like a challenge, but with these new tools, success can be yours. Feel free to share your goals and successes with us. We’re rooting for you!
